Joy.

My good friend, Jeanine, finally got her horse. He arrived Saturday and his name is Regal. He’s deep black and gorgeous. I drove past her house on Sunday and had to stop because I saw him standing outside the barn. Jeanine was napping in her little makeshift bed she assembled so that she could spend the first few nights with her new love. He had been with other horses his whole life and so going solo would be something new!

It’s actually hard for me to describe the sheer delight + joy that I witnessed in my friend that beautiful sunny afternoon. Jeanine told me all about Regal, her plans for getting him used to his new home, how she would be riding him on a regular basis (also something very new for him) and how she would give him warm sponge baths and groom his coat.

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Jeanine’s new beauty.

I haven’t really been around horses and so standing right next to such a strong and beautiful creature was a pretty awe-inspiring experience for me, even more so knowing this moment to be so precious to my friend. Jeanine showed me how to let him sniff my hand at first. I could already see Regal falling in love himself, totally at ease with Jeanine and allowing her to take his life into her own.

That might seem “over the top,” but that doesn’t stop me from describing it that way. You see, that’s how it is when you find a passion. When you are in love with something so much that everything else seems to fall away. I must have given Jeanine five or six hugs before I left. We talked about how it’s been a long time coming. She pointed out that she simply decided to DO IT NOW.

Get the horse now. Indulge in your passion, whatever that might be. Don’t wait and wait until conditions are “right.” Jeanine was done waiting.

Love that message! Yes, please. Let me have some of what you’re having. Passion can be contagious, I think. Witnessing it – in its most basic form – is a thing of beauty. Jeanine’s courageous move forward is inspiring to me on lots of levels. She’s jumping in, not entirely knowing if this horse will be “the perfect horse,” without knowing if she might experience some challenges down the road, which is sure to be the case. And that’s okay, because that’s also how it goes with passion. You’ve got to follow it, trust that you have the wherewithal to handle things that come up (good or bad) and just keep on moving forward, relishing in the beauty of the moment … the beauty + joy + excitement that only true passion can bring.

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You are invited.

How do YOU want to feel?

In your career. Your relationships. Your life.

That’s it. That’s the beauty of desire mapping. Figuring out how you want to feel and then doing things to make you feel that way. Sounds pretty simple and straightforward, doesn’t it?

Right! Except it has the potential to radically shift how think about and approach … well, everything. I like to think of this exercise as simple but profound.

I first started exploring my core desired feelings about two years ago and it’s really created a beautiful shift in my life. In small + big ways. This is why I wish to bring this work to you. That’s why I’ll be hosting my very first Desire Map Workshop in January …

and YOU are invited.

liveyourdesires

You are invited to explore this process for yourself. You are invited to join our Soul Circle of Desire Mappers who are seeking greater clarity for the New Year. You are invited to give yourself this gift of time and space … to stop and reflect and recharge. I’m inviting you to invest in yourself and to do it within the company and beauty of our special group.

Desire Map the New Year
Saturday, January 31
10:30 – 3:30 p.m.
Twelve 17 Coffee Shop

I am keeping this inaugural Soul Circle of Desire Mappers intentionally intimate to really help support and facilitate this work. I have a feeling (no pun intended!) that these ten spots will go fast.

So if this special opportunity is calling out to you –

reserve YOUR seat HERE.

Can’t wait to share in this experience.

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I’m doing it.

I’m becoming a Desire Map licensee. And I’m ecstatic! The move feels right and good and so I’m going for it. Two years ago now I hosted my first workshop leading participants through the Desire Mapping process as created by the most awesome Danielle LaPorte. I had two participants (kind souls that they are!) and my friend, Kamar, who I drafted in last minute. I learned a lot from that experience and I’m taking it as a sign that I’m meant to grab onto this opportunity and run with it.

I believe in the Desire Map process. In short, it’s a whole new way of approaching goal setting in your life. Instead of shooting for the tangible outcomes, you set your goals and intentions based on how you want to feel along the way. How you want to feel.

I know. Revolutionary.

LynnCoreDesiredFeelings

my core desired feelings.

It’s easy and it’s not so easy. When’s the last time you really thought about how you want to feel and then actually did stuff that allowed you to feel that way? If you haven’t tried it, you ought to. It’s a fun way to think about your life and your daily flow. It’s a great mindset to start cultivating.

Stay tuned for the first official Desire Map event hosted by >>> yours truly! 

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Alight

I don’t know about you but I’m way more productive and happy when I care less about things. It’s not like I don’t give two shits about whatever might be at hand, but when I start trying to achieve a certain outcome or begin second-guessing my actions, that’s when I get stuck in the muck.

And I don’t know about you, but I much rather be free floating and jamming it at the same time. In the zone, if you will. It’s like that inner confidence swells and I just am. I’m being who I am. I’m being who I want to be. I’m being what comes most natural. And it feels f*cking awesome.

I feel myself slipping into this mode more and more, if even for small segments of time. The more I do it though, the easier it seems to be. It’s like I’m one of those beautiful metallic blue damselflies that float from reed to reed along the rivers of summertime. They’re touching down and releasing their magic but then they’re off to the next spot in the next glance.

damselfly
the beautiful damselfly. one of the best things about summer.

So I’m going to be my own way these days and float from place to place and person to person – touching down with sincere connection but not thinking too long or too hard about it. These days I’m intuiting my way.

I Only Bring Love to the Drop-off

I said this in a text message to my friends half-jokingly, but the more I think about it, the more these words have helped me to “rise above” the drama that is our elementary school drop-off. It started when a fellow parent mentioned that “people” were talking about me on Facebook. I was like, what? They didn’t mention me by name – on the PTO Facebook page – but referrals to the “woman who gets out of the car and opens her trunk in the drop-off line” definitely pointed to me. I do it everyday dammit. And I’m proud of it. What I have to admit, however, is that I started to not feel proud in my actions and I even began to question my judgment. My friend did too as she succumbed to the advice – park in a parking spot and walk your kids across the moving traffic if you intend to exit your car. Bullshit.

It’s kinda funny (but not really) – this is our fourth year at this school and I don’t recall there being such an “issue” with the drop-off. Of course no set-up would ever be perfect and you always have to be careful with kids when in any kind of “parking and moving cars” situation. They even did some “improvements” to the set-up a few years back and it helped. Still, even with piles of snow stealing many of the usual suspect parking spots (not to mention the “illegal” ones being harder to access with snow), I honestly don’t recall there being such a hoopla. Don’t ask if I ever got a ticket for parking in one of those illegal spots!

I classify myself as being pretty efficient, so it really never occurred to me that my “exiting my car each morning to hand out back-packs, etc. to my kids as they each exited the car” (pretty efficiently, I might add) pissed some folks off. My first reaction to the parent who mentioned “the talk” on Facebook was like f-that. I’m going to continue to get out of my damn car, there’s no way I’m going to have the kids pile multiple bags on the floor (on top of their feet) in our four-door sedan. Yeah, that would make getting out of the car that much better. Not.

It’s been entertaining to see this situation evolve. Rather lengthy descriptions of the “how-to” of the drop-off regularly appear in the weekly newsletter – last week we even had a drawing – even more helpful in my opinion. My “geographer husband” pointed out how the illustration could have been drawn more “true to scale,” or something like that – you know, from the guy who makes maps for a living. His “grand scheme solution” (echoed by several other parents I’ve commiserated with on the subject) is to “switch” the bus/teacher parking lot with the drop-off parking lot. Everybody’s got an opinion. And maybe that’s the problem?

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I think this is a pretty good drawing!

While I didn’t actually “request to be added” to the PTO Facebook page, I did rely upon several of my “close confidantes” (each of whom probably spent more than an hour reading through the comments and such) to confirm that I probably “didn’t want to go there.” So I didn’t.

Instead, I ponied up some of my “yogic wisdom” and attempted to not attach to the drama of the drop-off.

The clincher part of this story is that I did attach. I started to feel bad about my “routine” of handing out bags to my kids while in the drop-off line. I became “self-conscious” each day as I zoomed in at exactly 8:41 (bell rings at 8:45) and slowly inched up among the long line of cars. For the record, I also don’t recall there being that many people dropping off in the morning, cars have never snaked that far back before. But then again, I could be wrong since in past years, I was tending to “zoom in” at 8:44. Don’t ask if I’ve received any “excessive tardy” letters either. I’m much improved this year – with a typical five-minute cushion. Except when the drop-off line eats up several of those minutes. Dammit. But I digress.

Seriously, I even started feeling a little stressed as I approached the drop-off. Unlike my friend who, after consulting someone “in the know” when it comes to the finer details of the drop-off procedure, decided that since “optimally” they want parents to “stay buckled” in the drop-off line, she would follow suite by parking and walking the kiddos across the moving lanes of traffic. Great idea, huh? So, I’m one of those “rule bender” parents who does NOT stay buckled, but instead, carries on with the “handing out of the bags” scenario described above.

These days, the drop-off is even more entertaining now that teachers are directing traffic (the good souls they are – I give them credit for trying). It’s kind of cute, seeing the principal waving cars to move up along the line, which really, in my opinion is the biggest problem associated with the drop-off. Folks not pulling ahead so that the entire line is filled, but instead, stopping right in front of the doors. Nothing’s ever going to be perfect, so I think the best solution here is a combination of paying attention to the “general flow” the principal and teachers are trying to achieve, while at the same time, doing what’s right for your own situation. Doing what’s best for you and your kids.

At least that’s what I’m doing. And despite only jokingly mentioning to my friends that “I only bring LOVE to the drop-off,” I’m finding this mantra to be quite helpful.

I’ve continued to exit my car to help my kids, even doing so in full view of the principal (I thought, here’s her chance to set me straight, if she’s gonna do it) and it’s all been good. I’ve payed extra attention to whether “other parents” exit their cars in the line, and while most “stay buckled,” a good portion do get out to help the little ones and to help with a bag or two. The point here is that we’re all doing what feels best to us and our individual situations.

If we all approach the drop-off with a little love and an extra dose of patience, things might actually improve. Which I do think is happening. For me personally, I’m not thinking about what other people might be thinking about me. I’m saying hi to my “friendly fellow parent peeps” as I usually do and I’m refraining from “talking smack” about the drop-off. It’s just not worth my time and energy. And it’s not worth yours.

So in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, let us all bring a little more love to the drop-off. It just might make it an uplifting and pleasant situation for everyone.

P.S. My “rule follower” friend recently texted me and said, “Done with the damn parking lot. Kids almost got run over.” So, she’s coming over to “my side” as a “rule bending” parent who exits her car because that just happens to be the best thing that works for her every morning at exactly 8:41 a.m.